“If you ever get the chance to love a person who knows grief, do not let them go. You see, the thing about grief is that it is not exclusive; it consumes life, it taints everything a little grey. It won’t hesitate to remind you that everyone and everything you love will disappear someday, but I have found that the people who carry grief, love with a fierceness that no one else knows. They understand what’s at stake because they have had to let someone go, so they remember the little things, and they show up when it counts. They know that life is rare; you won’t have to spell it out. So don’t take for granted the people who know loss, for they know more about love because they know what it costs.”
The experience of grief is unique to each individual, and can be triggered by a range of events, including loss, separation, or estrangement. My own journey with grief has been shaped by the estrangement from my brother, who has chosen to cut ties with our family. As I approach the two-year anniversary of this painful event, I’m reminded of the complex emotions that have accompanied me on this journey – the sadness, the anger, the confusion, and the deep sense of longing for resolution and healing.
February brought the surprise news that I’m an aunt, but my brother’s choice to withhold information has left us with nothing – no pictures, no updates, not even a name for my niece. We’re longing to connect with her, but it’s being denied.
Navigating life’s ups and downs has been a challenge. I have good days where I don’t dwell on things, but bad days where I’m consumed by thoughts of him and my niece. At work, I put on a brave face for the kids, and they help keep my mind off things.
I’ll always cherish the bond I share with my brother, but it feels like something’s missing, a piece of the connection that’s been with me my whole life. I yearn for the day he’ll come back to us and provide some answers.
Missing you my brother 💔
My Journey With CRPS/RSD 
Hi Margaret. My name is Beth and I too am suffering with CRPS. I’m 68 years old and I had major left foot and ankle surgery in May of 2023. When I first thought something was wrong was after my sutures were removed and I was put in a cast. I was in the cast a couple of weeks when I thought I might have a blood clot. I was having significant calf pain and 2 of my toes were turning blue. I had the cast removed and sent for a scan. No clot. About 2 weeks later, I was sitting on my shower chair and looked at my foot. It was purple from above my ankle to my toes. I immediately knew what it was. And so the nightmare began. I’m a retired Registered Nurse. That isn’t how I knew about CRPS. I had a fellow nurse develop it following her bilateral knee replacements. So many of the people we worked with thought she was crazy. I knew she wasn’t. My orthopedic’s pain management doctor had nothing to offer other than try 2 injections in my back. When they did nothing he basically said that’s all I can offer you. I live in Fort Myers, Florida. I found a doctor in Clearwater FL who has had great success with ketamine infusions. I’ve researched it and I think that is my only possible way to get some relief. Have you heard of it or tried it yourself? I’d love to hear from someone who has. I pray every day that someone will find a cure for us. Hard to stay positive when some level of pain is always present. Just when my life should be filled with all good things. That’s been taken away. I love pickleball and had to give that up. I love golf(not well) but I love it. Some days are ok and I can play but more often I have to sit out. Nights are horrible but I know I’m preaching to the choir.
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